Have you ever had points in your life where you just have to stop and say to yourself, "Self, listen to this question very closely. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!" Yeah, i've been have a ton of those lately.
"I think that maybe it's just bad luck. We could have been born rich, and thin, and powerful. We could have been worth their time."
He asked me why relationships scared me so much. i responded with this conversation John and i had once. The one i've posted at least once a year since then so that i would never forget.
"I've been thinking about it a lot recently, and, if you look at it philosophically, it doesn't make sense. The pain is unavoidable. Either somebody gets dumped or somebody dies, there's no way out..."
i don't want to hurt him or hurt myself, but it would never actually work out.
"...but it's not just the ending, it's the whole concept. It's giving such a huge part of yourself to someone whose intentions you can never truly know; sacrificing so much of your freedom of choice for a few moments, or months, or years of pleasure."
~*maria*~
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