Everything's Too Cold...

It's ridiculous. I don't understand what you're thinking. I don't really care, I guess.

All I know is, if it continues, I'll regret it.

I don't want that.

I don't want you to love me anymore.

I couldn't even think about you.

I was thinking of someone else.

With my bags packed and ready to go, nothing's ever hurt so much for me than to let you go.

~*maria*~

--Baby Blue, The Early November

Time Passed

i broke up with Joe a couple weeks ago. i pissed Manda off, i don't know how. There's a new boy...and an old one. Except i don't have anyone to talk to about everything that has happened in a few short weeks.

~*maria*~

Just Maybe

Maybe i'm too mean. But i'm okay with it. Some people just aren't deserving of me bestowing my awesomeness on them.

~*maria*~

World of Warcraft

i feel so left out all the time in our guild now. i know this is stupid to be writing about, but WoW is pretty much my life. And i was having such a great time playing with just the few of us. But then they started wanting to raid. And now there's tons of people in our guild and they don't even invite me to do stuff with them anymore. And i keep asking them if i can off tank but they always just ignore me. Fuck it.

~*maria*~

Can i Lie With You In Your Grave?

i wish he at least understood why i don't like her. There used to be something between them. Everyone knows it even though he denies it. That together with the fact that every time he hangs out with her he insists they be alone makes me want to punch her in the face whenever i see her.

There are still times when i really don't want to be with him anymore. When i feel that it's like this isn't going to last and i'm wasting my time. That i should just give up on him ever changing and just go find someone else. We've been together for almost a year and when i look back at it i had fun, mostly, but he doesn't feel like the one i'm going to be with for very long.

Maybe if i was a ginger and flailed around whenever someone touched me my boyfriend would love me too.

~*maria*~

i don't understand why the world perpetually just shits all over me. All the time. i can never get a fucking break.

~*maria*~

I'm Okay; I'm All Right

{No Lies, Just Love} is five years old. And to celebrate, here is one of my favorite songs of all time.

If I ever leave this world alive
I'll thank you for the things you did in my life
If I ever leave this world alive
I'll come back down and sit beside your feet tonight
Where ever I am, you'll always be
More than just a memory
If I ever leave this world alive

If I ever leave this world alive
I'll take on all the sadness
That I left behind
If I ever leave this world alive
The madness that you feel will soon subside
So in a word don't shed a tear
I'll be here when it all gets weird
If I ever leave this world alive

So when in doubt just call my name
Just before you go insane
If I ever leave this world
Hey I may never leave this world
But if I ever leave this world alive

She says I'm okay; I'm all right,
Though you have gone from my life
you said that it would
Now everything should be all right

She says I'm okay; I'm all right
Though you have gone from my life
You said that it would
Now everything should be all right
Yeah should be all right
--If I Ever Leave This World Alive, Flogging Molly

~*maria*~